Oh, Dad!

 

Oh, Dad!

Dads… We love them. Every dad is special in his own way… but let’s just get real here… The one thing they all have in common? The dad jokes! So we thought, why not put together a compilation of the dad-iest jokes the world has to offer! 

Got more?? Drop a comment and we will do a FB post attributing it to you. Just to spread a little laughter!

1.
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.
2.
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
3.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
4.
Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
5.
If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting “a rest”?
6.
The secret service isn’t allowed to yell “Get down!” anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell “Donald, duck!”
7.
My daughter screeched, “Daaaaaad, you haven’t listened to one word I’ve said, have you!?” What a strange way to start a conversation with me…
8.
My friend keeps saying “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.” I know he means well.
9.
Today, my son asked “Can I have a bookmark?” and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.
10.
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

 

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